Gr8ful!

It’s November!! 

In the States the slew of holidays are just starting. 

It’s Cheshvan!! 

In Israel (and the Jewish world) the holidays are finally over! It’s been a long month of Chagim/holidays. This month is our only month with no holidays. It’s a time to reflect on what we learned about ourselves last month, as we descend in to the darkest days of the next few months. Winter!

Daylight savings helps a bit, but lack of light brings its own joys and hardship. That’s a blog for another day. 

Thanks to Facebook, I'm reminded that I’ve had a practice for over 7 years of a day of Gr8fulness during the month of November. 

Which lead me to think about my practice of journaling what I’m thankful for each day. Which lead me to simultaneously think of two more thoughts:

How are blessings connected to this practice?

As well as the idea of seeing/finding beauty each day. 

A handful of years ago, a therapist taught me this trick for getting out of my own head (especially when you are having a hard time).

Start looking for things that are beautiful, bring you joy, make you happy. 

He asked me, what did you see on the way here that was beautiful? My first reaction was I didn’t see anything that was beautiful driving here. I drive this road up and down every single day. 

But given a new task, to find something beautiful, as I drove home I really looked around to see what I could find... and lo and behold, I noticed how beautiful the sunlight was bouncing off the snow on the golf course. 

It made me smile. Finding the first thing, made it easier to keep finding other things. Try it! It really works!

In one of my classes, Striving for the Divine we have been studying the word blessing/ bracha. How would you define blessing?* I know it might seem like I’m getting all religious... but you don’t have to go there. Here’s what my class came up with as a way to start to think about the word blessing. MORE! Activation, to greet, increase, recognition of process, ability, to bless, purpose and more. We also discussed ways we use the word blessing and how we bless.

Notes from my sourcebook

 

In this week's Parsha, right off the bat, the word Bracha is used 5 times in one paragraph. WOW!

This is the first time we are meeting Abraham. G!d is taking to Abraham saying…

וְאֶֽעֶשְׂךָ֙ לְג֣וֹי גָּד֔וֹל וַאֲבָ֣רֶכְךָ֔ וַאֲגַדְּלָ֖ה שְׁמֶ֑ךָ וֶהְיֵ֖ה בְּרָכָֽה׃

וַאֲבָֽרֲכָה֙ מְבָ֣רְכֶ֔יךָ וּמְקַלֶּלְךָ֖ אָאֹ֑ר וְנִבְרְכ֣וּ בְךָ֔ כֹּ֖ל מִשְׁפְּחֹ֥ת הָאֲדָמָֽה׃

I will make of you a great nation, And I will bless you;  

I will make your name great,  And you shall be a blessing.

I will bless those who bless you

And curse him that curses you;  

And all the families of the earth Shall bless themselves by you.”

So holding all three of these ideas: a gratitude journal, looking for beauty each day, and blessings, I’m proposing to myself, and to you, it’s never too late for us to start.

You can keep it on your phone, on real paper, or even just in your head. It’s great to have a group, accountability buddies. I can make one on what’sapp, let me know if you want to be added. Or you can even text me or email me, I’ll share mine with you too.*

Here’s the assignment:

What are you grateful for each day?

Where do you find blessing?

Or in what or where do you find beauty? Joy? Happiness?

Push yourself to answer the next question too, why?*

Blessing each of you with Shalom/Peace and incredible heath. 

You are each a blessing in my life. 

You show up, and help me grow. 

Forever gr8ful! 

Thank you!

With ahava love/אהבתי,

Tamy

PS

From now on this will be sent from a NEW EMAIL ADDRESS:

withahava@gmail.com

My goal is to send out a blog twice a month, I know we are all swimming in emails, if you want me to take you off my list, no hurt feeling, just let me know. 

* I'd love to hear what you are thinking, drop me a note or text. 

xxoo, 

T

what did I write last year? 
 לך־לך Go Forth 5779

Newest photo from our field trip following the Sanhedrin Trail

I love Sukkot

My Sukkah 5780/2019

Hi friends, don't forget anything that is in purple and in bold is a hyperlink for more informartion.
I love Sukkot!
And I love it even more in Israel. Sukkahs pop up in every place imaginable. On peoples balconies*, vacant lots, almost every restaurant has one attached to their outdoor area or sidewalk. 

There has been so much written about why we build and sit in these booths. Click here for more info. It’s a temporary dwelling. The Mitzvah is to sit in a sukkah. People eat them, sleep in them and even work in them. I did most of this writing today in my sukkah.

Last year I thought a lot about what it means to live in a temporary state of being. Everything about last Sukkot felt temporary, transient to me. Not stable, even a bit fragile. Pretty much my whole life felt that way for most of the year.

So... we as Jews, spend one week a year living in this state, what are we supposed to be thinking about? 

About what it means to live in this three walled hut with a thatched roof. It for sure makes me grateful for the type of houses we live in. Stable, secure, protected. Many of my friends from Chicago or the northern states, posted beautiful pictures of the Sukkahs the built earlier in the week, but by the end of the week many had blown over and were a mess of poles, sheets and schach( the green stuff on top). For sure not a stable environment.

There’s a level of simplicity to living like this for a week. It’s a bit like camping. You just take the essentials. A table, a handful of chairs, maybe a mattress, some candles and lights, and of course food. So much food!!!

What else do you really need? I think that’s one of the questions we’re supposed to be asking ourselves. What do I really need?

Extra large Etrog and Lulav

I built a sukkah this year for the very first time in Israel (with the help of my landlord neighbors). Starting my second year here in Israel and second Sukkot, I've spent some time thinking about how much more stable and grounded I feel this year. I’m slowly starting to plant roots. Maybe not deep, deep roots like a big oak tree, but more like a cactus or some kind of plant that has shallow roots that spread far and wide. I feel my roots very connected to both Israel and the United States. Just like my dual citizenship, I'll always have two homes. I think we are always striving for permanency at the same time knowing we live in a world knocking us all off balance.

Two blessing to end this holiday season:
I bless you with a balance of permanency with some temporally mixed in to keep you on your toes. With roofs, walls and friends that shelter you from the storms. And with gratitude that you have enough, you are enough and you have what you need. 

I went with my friend Aviva to the Kotel** for Birkot Cohanim

May G!d bless you, and guard you –
יְבָרֶכְךָ יהוה, וְיִשְׁמְרֶךָ

May G!d make his/her face shine unto you, and be gracious to you –
יָאֵר יהוה פָּנָיו אֵלֶיךָ, וִיחֻנֶּךָּ

May G!d  lift up her/his face unto you, and give to you peace –יִשָּׂא יהוה פָּנָיו אֵלֶיךָ, וְיָשֵׂם לְךָ שָׁלוֹם

As always, sending this with so much love/ ahava
שנה טובה
Tamy 

PS Still collecting words for 5780, read the last post and send me yours this week. xxoo, T

*Ask me more about what makes a Sukkah kosher. I studied a lot of הֲלָכָה/ halacha the rules of Sukkot this year.
** Yes, I am wearing a tallit, my dad's. Both of my parents are Cohen, makes me a double Cohanim. Ready to give blessings at anytime :-)

What's Your Word for 5780? שנה טובה

 

Just like a good storyteller uses the same word multiple times to make a point, so does the Torah. When I’m studying a piece of text I’ve been taught to look for the words repeated multiple times. Usually 3, 7 or more times in the same paragraph. When that happens the text is really asking you to pay attention. 

Since being back at Pardes, the same word keeps coming up for me in the text I’ve been studying. Mountain הר

I see it at least once a day if not more.
I started wondering why mountain. What does this word mean to me? How does it connect to my life?
 
Many of you know, I like to think of a word for the year, my intention for the new year. 
Rosh Hashana starts this Sunday night September 29th. I’ve been playing around with the question what’s my word? Mountain? What could that mean? 
At first I thought it meant exploration. But I've come to learn in Hebrew the word for pregnancy is הריון. It’s related to mountain. Maybe the shape of a women’s body? No, I’m not telling you I’m pregnant.
At least not in that sense. But maybe I am pregnant with new ideas, thoughts and insights. Maybe I’m about to birth a new reality, a new project, a new me.

Israel is full of both mountains and hills. We are always either ascending or descending both spiritually and physically. Again I'm left wondering how this fits into my life too.

I love to look up words on thesaurus.com. Here’s some synonyms for mountain that resonate with me:
    •    abundance
    •    eminence
    •    range
    •    elevation
    •    bluff and cliff to name a few
What’s your word for 5780?
 
I love to collect these words each year. Last year people sent me their words, I’m happy to send you back yours if you would like. One of my amazing friends, Suzi, love this idea so much that when her group of high school girlfriends went on their annual weekend. They each wrote down their words and sent them to me. Honored to be the keeper of the words. 


Last year at Pardes I gave this over as a D’var Torah. Many of my classmates shared words with me, as the year unfolded every once a while one of them would come over and say remember my word, it was true. It’s happening. Want to read what I wrote last year? 5779



So what’s your word for 5780?
 
Here are some of the words I've already collected for 5780:
    •    consistency
    •    pushing
    •    vulnerability
    •    hope
    •    strength
    •    attending

My word for last year was abundance. The year before bravery. Each time I think about these words I also think about the balance that needs to come with it. We can’t have too many mountains or too much abundance. We all need balance.

So for a third time, three being intention- what’s your word for 5780?*

Today is your day to think about what blessings you need for 5780. Write them down, share them with your crew, share with me.
Think of them as you go through this next year.
Feel them when you are struggling, know you are loved and blessed.

Email me at withahava@gmail.com and I’ll save them with your name to remind you next year. Or write them at the bottom of this blog, please add your name.

I wish you and yours a Shana Tova, a Happy and Healthy 5780!
May we all be blessed with new ideas, consistency, hope and strength as well as taking on the vulnerabilities that come with living life to the fullest. Be brave!
 Take Chances! Live Life!

As always, sending this with so much love/ ahava
שנה טובה
Tamy
 *Some say intention is when you answer for the third time. Maybe the first two times you said it by mistake, but three is the lucky number.

Taking a Year Off

Imagine sitting in the shade on a Saturday morning. There’s a bit of a breeze. We just finished davvening (praying) and had a snack. It’s our final Pardes Shabbaton. We are in Tavor Alon at a retreat center. Everyone is relaxed and happy. We’ve broken into small groups to reflect back on the past year. 
Many of us (myself included) say something to the effect of... taking a year off my life I learned... I changed... I grew. 
When the third person used the phrase I took a year off, a friend sitting near me said under his breath-  
we didn’t take a year off we took a year on.

At first glimpse it seems like we have put our lives on hold. We left our families and friends, our careers, the path we were on to come here- to study at Pardes in Israel. 
Putting our lives on hold seems like we are just on vacation. Taking sometime off, at the end of the day, going back and picking up our day-to-day lives.  Heraclitus said, “No woman ever steps in the same river twice, for it’s not the same river and she’s not the same woman.”*
Even if we thought we could walk back into our old lives, we can’t. We’ve changed.

The idea of taking a year on has really made me think. What if we had re-framed our year to think this is our year of living on? 
Not sleepwalking through our lives. Really being present. Being open to new opportunities. New people. New experiences. As the yogis say looking at the world with eyes of wonder. Abraham Joshua Heschel said our goal should be to live life in radical amazement.

As I look back on this past year, I see that I really have taken a year on. I’ve changed in ways I can’t even express. I’m still learning a whole new language as well as culture, let alone landscape. Israeli Jews are just as diverse as diaspora Jews. 
I’ve learned more about my beliefs and values. 
Just how strong I am. I’m braver than I ever realized.  
I’ve said yes to so many things, which I would have never said yes to before.

I studied Tanakh and Talmud. I even learned Gemara. I love Gemara, best mind puzzle in the world.

I made new friendship and relationships. I went to so many places by myself, taking a deep breath and saying hello, what’s your name.

I took classes on Conflict Resolution, Sexuality, Hassidut, text based Spirituality, The Piasetzna Rebbe, Rambam and so much more.

I’ve gone to concerts and shirs (talks) all in Hebrew not always understanding what they are saying, just taking in all in. Letting it roll over me.

I’ve prayed at the Kotel at midnight, at 4am with the sun coming up, by myself and with both Women of the Wall groups. 
I’ve explored new venues of prayer. From mechitza to Jewish Renewal and everything in between.
I’ve hiked in the north and south; Golan, Galilee and swam in the Mediterranean Sea. I’ve officially been here for all 4 seasons.

I am super aware that I have a life that most people don’t really get to do or have. Many dream of it, but few actually take the leap. I totally get it. If things in my own life had not changed, I probably would not be here either. In a strange way, I can’t help but be grateful for all the changes that brought me here. Gratitude still permeates my life.

So how do I end my year on? My year as a first year full time yeshiva student? If you know me well you already know…

I jump back in the water.

I know I am not ready to be finished at Pardes yet. The first weeks were so hard, overwhelming to say the least. My head was on overload. Trying to take in all of the class information, new language, new people, new everything. I have been offered the privilege and opportunity to spend another year studying. I can literally hit the ground running. As one of my teachers said, Tamy, I’ve watched you shed the layers of your old self during your short time here. I can feel the change in myself.
I know, next year will allow me to take higher-level Hebrew classes. I get to study halakhah, Rav Kook and delve deeper into so many of the texts that I have always loved. I am excited and honored to be part of the 2019-2020 Second Year Scholars Fellowship Program.

Shavout dovetailed right into the end of Shabbat. I’ve been blessed with a year of learning Torah. I am excited to keep sharing my Torah with all of you and learning the Torah you bring into this world.
I bless us all with living life on. Waking up each day, asking what can I learn today? Not sleepwalking through our lives. 

I challenge you to take a few minutes each day and think, what is the Torah/stories I am meant to share with the world? What are my gifts? Have I shared them today?
Holding you all so tight,
Sending much love and blessings,
With Ahava,

Tamy
*of course I had to change his quote to feminine. 

  Photos from Purim to Shavout

Pesach, I can eat junk food :-)

Time Flies- My first 6 months in Israel

Sherri at her daughter Daisy's Bat Mitzvah

Time flies…
    when you are having fun
    when you fill your days with study and text
    when you are traveling and engaged in new adventures
    when you are learning a new language
    creating a new identity and life

Time even flies…
    when you are bored
    when you are stuck in a rut
    when you feel frozen

Time seems to come to a standstill…
    when you are sitting in a hospice room, saying goodbye to your
    best friend/cousin who is like your one of your sisters

Today is my birthday
    last year I woke up in Tucson, Arizona visiting Max
Today I wake up
    in my new apartment in Jerusalem, about to go to school
Next year…
    who knows

Years fly by…
    First I’m 5 years old, then 10, 15, 25, 35, 45, 55, 65, 75, 85, 95,         120…

Minutes, hours, days, years fly by in a blink of an eye…
    So make the most of the time you are given
        collect memories
            smile, laugh, hug, engage with lifecry and scream, lay in bed when you need to 
then get up, dust yourself off and start over again

    Time flies by...
            In a blink of an eye

This poem is written in memory of my beautiful cousin Sherri Takiff Zirlin.
She died on December 31, 2018, a month before her 50th birthday.

In honor of her life and mine…
I hope you will smile at someone you don’t know.
Hug up your people.
Call your family.
Tell the people you love- how much you love them.
Love yourself.
And just smile.

February 24, 2019

Collecting Memories

PS what I've been doing since my last blog post in October

Learning Biblical Hebrew grammar

Thanksgiving 2018, Chicago with over 40 family members

8th Night of Hanukah Dec 2018 back in Jerusalem

I finally have dual citizenship! Dream come true!

Got to see Uncle Jack on my visit to Chicago January 2019

Tu B'shvat Seder in the Jerusalem Hills January 2019

Now I'm really an Israeli- everyone wears these shoes :-)

Studying Torah, I can read out loud and translate! Chanting is next years goal.

My first sporting event in Israel, cool basketball game. We lost but had fun.

Women of the Rail! Havdallah on the רַכֶּבֶת

Eclipse over Jerusalem- super cool! Thanks, Ari

Beautiful flowers on the hill where I watched the eclipse with friends

My Dad's yahrzeit January 18

My Mom yahrzeit January 31

 Amazing day of hiking to see the red kalaniyot flowers

I love this photo of me.
Wearing my Mandela spirituality shirt
(I am safe, I am loved, I am where I am supposed to be) at the same time wearing tefillin in a sea of red flowers.  I am in heaven. I embody polarities!
First time laying tefillin.  

Dear ones, 
I think overall that catches you up a bit. I have 2 more blog posts ready to send later this week. My trip to Turkey in Jan, a talk I gave at Pardes.
With so much love/אהבתי and gratitude,
Tamy 

 

לך־לך Go Forth 5779

ויאמר יהוה אל־אברם לך־לך מארצך וממולדתך ומבית אביך אל־הארץ אשר אראך

The LORD said to Abram, “Go forth from your native land and from your father’s house to the land that I will show you.

ואעשך לגוי גדול ואברכך ואגדלה שמך והיה ברכה

I will make of you a great nation, And I will bless you; I will make your name great, And you shall be a blessing.

ואברכה מברכיך ומקללך אאר ונברכו בך כל משפחת האדמה

I will bless those who bless you And curse him that curses you; And all the families of the earth Shall bless themselves by you.” *

October 19, 2018

Dear one, 

Many people have suggested that this parsha (chapter) sums up my life lately. Go forth from your home… And you shall be a blessing…

So I took the time this week to read it, really read it and see what it says. As I read, I realized this part of leaving and becoming a blessing is only one piece of the story. On my count, there are at least 10 plus stories going on in this weeks reading. 

Now that in its self sums up my life. Not only am I on a journey, not only do I feel blessed, but I have at least 10 stories happening at the same time to share with you all since my last blog post in September. I can’t believe it’s been that long since I last wrote. WHAT?!

Here are a couple themes, from my last month in Jerusalem. So much more to say on each one of these bullet points. 

·      The High Holiday Services spanned the gambit from: amazing, interesting, mind-blowing, spiritual to lonely, a bit boring, what am I doing here and even the mundane. One of my goals for this year is to be as open to new possibilities and new experiences as I can. So I am trying many different types of services. Learning from all. Very interesting. 

·      So many people have open hearts and tables to me. Welcomed me into their homes and families. Fed me, and introduced me to their families and friends. WOW! Just wow! Thank you all, it really means so much to me. 

·      Starting with Rosh Hashanna (in September) until Simchat Torah (ending Oct 2^nd) I’ve has so many breaks from school. Each time we would start, there would be yet another holiday. Sukkot break meant having almost two weeks off of classes. Just as I was starting to get the hang of Hebrew and the stamina for a whole day of learning, we would have another break. I’m happy to say, this week we had our first whole week back at school and I made it though :-) 

     I‘m even happier to say I had some really amazing, insights this week as I studied texts. 

·      I figured out how to add tabs on my blog. If you look at the top, you will now see home, learning and art. I would love to share what I am studying with those of you who want to study along with me. My plan is to add to this tab weekly. I'll include what I am studying and a bit of insights. For today, I added a link to Pardes and listed the classes I am taking. You can read more about the classes and teachers on the Pardes website. 

    I'll keep adding more art to the art link too.

·      Friends, did I mention, I’ve met so many people! It’s been surreal. For a while it seemed like I was literally meeting at least one new person a day, most days even more than one. I even thought about writing down a list of all the people I’ve met, I’m sure close to 500 people. 

  

     I did come up with criteria about what it means to know someone, if they shared at least three things about themselves and so did I. You would be surprised how many times people would share information (very personal) about themselves and walk away never knowing anything about me.

With that being said, it will come as no surprise, I’ve been thinking a lot about relationships. I’ll share more in future blog posts. 

·      My last blog post was about words for 5779. If you missed it, click here for the link. I loved your words for 5779. In my head, I wrote a beautiful post with all of your words. They were each lovely and unique, as well as universal. I'll try to put that blog in writing very soon.

This post is getting longer and longer. It’s going to be Shabbat here in the next couple of hours (minutes). I really just wanted to let you all know I am alive and well. Very well, indeed. Very HAPPY! Still missing you all, and the homesickness has subsided for the most part. 

Blessing you with listening to your calling(s), even when they may seem difficult. 

With so much love/אהבתי,
Tamy 

PS

*Did you notice, the word blessing appears 5 times in this short paragraph?