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Sunday, September 13, 2020

Home

When you invoke the idea of home, what do you think about?

Is it your current home? The place you grew up? Or maybe even your parent’s home?

Is there a favorite smell and when you smell it you are reminded of home? 

Or is home a feeling you get when you get off the plane? Ahh… I’m home!

Is it a visual, wow that house looks a lot like the place I call my home. 

Is it a feeling of being grounded, loved, nurtured? 

Is it about family, people or memories?

 

The idea of home being where your heart is and where your feet are really speaks to me. I’ve been thinking a lot about the difference between a home and the place we live.

 

When was the last time you moved?

When I was a kid we moved a lot, all around the East Coast.  It wasn’t until I was in 5th grade we finally lived someplace for more than two years. I was the kid who could proudly say, I’ve lived in 5 places in the first 10 years of my life. As a kid that was pretty darn cool. I have had conversations with some of you and know you had the same experience. When I came to Chicago (my mom’s hometown) for undergrad, I settled here. My mom’s family all live here. The place I came to visit as a kid. My grandparents, aunts/uncles and so many cousins all live here. All of the sudden I was home!

 

I lived here for over 30 years until two years ago when I moved to Israel. Each time I got off the plane in Israel, I felt like I was home. My shoulders lowered down into my back. My face just smiled. My whole self said…  I’m home. Take a look at this older blog post regarding my feelings of loving two homes at once.  

A month and a half ago, I came back again to Chicago, the place where I grew into a grown-up.  

This time is different. 

I am different. 

Two years ago we sold the house I used to call my home. Those memories now live in my mind, heart, and in way too many boxes that have been living in storage for the last 2 1/2 years. 

 

The song Home by Phillip Phillips has been playing in my head all week, especially these lines.

Settle down, it'll all be clear

Don't pay no mind to the demons

They fill you with fear

The trouble it might drag you down

If you get lost, you can always be found

Just know you're not alone

'Cause I'm going to make this place your home

 

As of September 1st, I became a proud renter of a one-bedroom apartment in Evanston, Illinois. It’s really pretty and light. Hardwood floors and that old building feel. Last week the movers loaded up the contents of my storage locker and brought boxes and boxes of things to my new place. For some people opening boxes that have been in storage for a few years is like Christmas morning. The excitement, the anticipation, and the wonder of what you’re going to find in the box can be really invigorating. But not for me, I had a feeling of dread. What in the world did I pack in these boxes? Some are labeled books, those are the easy ones. A few are labeled dishes, photos or kid's art. 

But the rest… OY! I have no earthly idea. 

 

Slowly I’ve begun opening the boxes, mostly smiling with delight when I find prized items that I had forgotten I still owned. And with a bit more joy in my heart, I set about unpacking. Tonight as I sit in my living room on my new couch looking around at the beautiful flowers in the vase on the table I used to love, I can take a deep breath in and feel like I am finally home. 

 

With love (ahava), 

Tamy

 

PS

Chicagoland Moving and Storage are my heroes! Igal and Erez are also my friends.

They have kept all of my things safe in storage for over two years.
They moved me into my new home. Can’t thank them enough.
Please use them for your moving and storage needs.

 

Sad news from the Jacobs Family:

Our pretty dog Ike, loved our family, toys and going for walks. And boy did he love the snow. He kept us safe from the postman.
As his dad wrote: A glorious life lived in service of others happiness.
He took his last breath on Sat Sept 12, 2020
It’s sad. 
I’m sad.
He was a part of our family for over 16 years. 
💔

He loved his toys




9 comments:

  1. how did you settle on evanston? and not philly:)
    ? GRR

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  2. I’m glad you were happy with the gifts sent from the before time. You did a great job culling back then—you did the best you could for a version of self you couldn’t yet imagine. A fun bit of time travel.

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  3. Sending loving condolences about Ike. I do love that sone "Home". Glad you are enjoying your apartment!

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  4. Glad you're settling in. Welcome back. Slowly, slowly..

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  5. Welcome home, Tamy. A friend just sent me a little book you might enjoy: Sanctuary, A Meditation on Home, Homelessness, and Belonging, by Zenju Earthlyn Manuel. May you settle in with ease and joy.

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  6. What a delight to open up treasures in your boxes. It's like a time capsule! When I think of home, I'm still split between continents like you are. We are travelers at heart! May we know many homes. xxx

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  7. What a delight to open up treasures in your boxes. It's like a time capsule! When I think of home, I'm still split between continents like you are. We are travelers at heart! May we know many homes. xxx CARM (I can't seem to make my name appear :) )

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  8. Nice job Tamy. Very sincere and personal. Glad you're back.

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